In order to prepare for my spot today on The After Show for Netroots Radio I had to listen to both of the GOP debates…twice. I could give you insightful, thoughtful analysis especially about Republican economics but, frankly, the League of Sub-Ordinary Crackpots wore me down and I just don’t have that in me today. I’ll get to it, just not today. Instead, on The After Show I had something of a cathartic rant and I thought there might be those who would like to read it so I am posting it here as well. – Carrots! Arilss Bunny, Netroots Radio Monetary Policy and Financial News Burrow Chief
Keep hopping for my partially exasperated, partially funny take on the candidates you won’t be hearing from for very much longer.
The GOP Kid’s Table debate: where good facts go to die. Carly Fiorina “won” and she did it without having to use a single accurate fact. Politifact verified that. Zip. Zilch. A perfect zero.
Some wunderkinder at the Kids Table thought it was news that China and Russia are using cyberwarfare. GASP Has anyone told the NSA??? I listened for the audience, to see if they had any reaction to this but there were literally only thirty-two people in the seats. “Bueller? Bueller?”
Lindsey Graham made a serious attempt to win at GOP bingo by hitting as many off-topic code words as possible in the shortest amount of time but then he basically dissolved into talking about his sad, sad life and ended up looking like he needed a hug…from John McCain.
The Kids Table Debate was the debate of NO. No on immigration. No on the economy. No on healthcare for anyone but especially no on healthcare for women. No on Dodd-Frank. No on Common Core. In fact, no on the whole Department of Education. No on the EPA. No on preserving Medicare. No on taxing those who can afford to pay taxes. No on entitlements but we’ll make it up by funding defense programs the DoD doesn’t even want.
But, to be fair, there were exceptions. Yes on Keystone XL, yes on “the fence,” and yes on killing women to save fetuses. Yes on tax cuts for everyone except working families. Yes on endangering social security. Yes on forcing China to act only in its own interests. Yes on backing Russia into a corner. Yes on blowing up all our relationships with all of our allies…except Israel. And yes on war with Iran.
These are people who live in a world of magical thinking and I don’t mean ambitious thinking, I mean unicorns are dancing the can-can under a rainbow magical thinking. These are folks who think that racing our economy to the bottom such that we can attract manufacturing jobs back from China is a good idea! I’m thinking, why stop there? Let’s use the Second Amendment to springboard into a hunting and gathering economy. Right! Are you with me?
These are people with minds and hearts so small and so focused on their own personal glory that they plan to repeal every single executive order President Obama has signed since entering the Presidency with no consideration as to what those orders might be. They only need know that they were signed by the black, Kenyan, Muslim, vegan, satan. These are truly six-shooter minds in a fully-automatic world.
These are people who think that political correctness is a problem but the seemingly daily murders of citizens by law enforcement is not.
And in closing – none of them can count. People, they asked you to describe Hillary in two words. Two words, people! TWO WORDS!
Actually, no, I take that back because I do have a question for the candidates and it is this: if you were so easily fooled by a clearly doctored video that purports to show Planned Parenthood employees saying things they did not truly say, how can you represent yourself as someone capable of evaluating conflicting intelligence reports which may or may not directly effect national security…on a daily basis?