Arliss Bunny's Blog

I’m sure I at least mentioned it. I’m from Kenya. We know this because I was born in Indiana and I’m a different color than many of you. More to the point, because of my coloring, I have a “Kenyan anti-colonial” worldview. What this means is that if you do not have an accurate predictive model for my behavior unless you have a clear understanding of Kenyan history and politics. Oh, yes, and you need to be a racist. Being a bigot helps but racism is really the handle by which you can carry away this pot. Newt Gingrich and Dinesh D’Souza found me out. Their firm mastery of the racism laid me bare before them.

I must learn to accept the repercussions of being a Kenyan anti-colonialist. Either that or someone needs to teach all these idiots what words mean and I have to tell you, the chances of the latter having any impact at all is about the same as the chances of me turning down my serving of kale leaf tonight. (For those not fortunate enough to live with a Kenyan anti-colonialist rabbit, the odds of kale rejection occurring would be zilch.)

There is an old joke: the UK and the US are two nations divided by one language. An example of this would be as follows:

British, ” I think I’ll knock her up and see if she has a rubber I can borrow.”

American, “I think I’ll call her and see if she has an eraser I can borrow.”

Frankly, it’s funnier when the Brits say it but that’s not my point. It has become clear to me that Americans now fall into three groups divided by a single language. There are those who still use words as they are defined in the dictionary, also known as Democrats; those who use existing words and invent totally unrelated definitions to suit their political ends, also known as Conservative Republicans or the Tea Party; and those who invent their own words from scratch, also known as computer nerds, if you grok my meaning.

For the Conservative Republicans/Tea Party, it works like this:

1. select a scary sounding word, like “Muslim” or “Kenya” or “Qur’an” or “anti-colonialist”;
2. attach to it all kinds of racist and bigoted rhetoric that is designed to frighten people remembering that unlike bunnies, humans are at the top of the food-chain but near the bottom of the common sense chain;
3. know that, historically, identifying with cruelty generally works out, like the fans cheering for Michael Vick this weekend;
4. make sure that at no time is factual information or factually based educational material allowed to gain a foothold;
5. dominate the weak-willed, corporate-owned, conservative main-stream media.

So, in a nutshell, that explains why I am both a Kenyan anti-colonialist and a Muslim. My response is this:

People, buy a dictionary! Read a book! Grow some balls! Muslims, Kenya and the Qur’an aren’t the enemy – ignorance is – and vicious, rabbit-eating coyotes. I think we can all agree on that.